Member-only story
Zombies Might Wear Footie Pajamas
Zombie shamblers have eclectic costume tastes.
One Sunday morning, I was driving myself home after having attained one-ness with my zombie nature. I stopped at a red light, and a scooter passed right there in front of me. On it was an adult personage bundled in massive layers because of the negative degrees and snow outside. I failed to notice that at first, because what caught my eyes were the footie pajamas adorning this person’s feet.
I followed their feet up to their legs where they had HUGE sized teddy bears swarming their calves. We’re talking teddy bears of Chihuahua-sized proportions. It was at that moment I made a decision. I must know /who/ was this daring in the middle of winter. I looked up at the person’s face. The person was swathed in enough scarves to make an assassin protecting their identity proud, and certainly enough to distract any zombie from being able to eat them properly.
I continued to rudely gape in zombie fashion as the person finished crossing the street in front of me on their way to Walgreen’s. I have only one regret — that I didn’t follow and find out who that masked teddy-bear footie pajama bandit was. Obviously they held a kinship to me and my silly costume wearing ways.
Best footie pajamas ever to be attacked and eaten by a zombie in.
You’re never too old to wear whatever you want. You’re also never too young to make people admire your fashion sense in traffic.